Heavenly new room!

We took an elevator ride to a new room.  

Kyle got to work out of an extra room they had, and so he was here for the move.

It is GLORIOUS!

From dreary...

To hopeful...

...and a bathroom!

We got to unhook her devices and go on a short walk.

This image captures the first time we have ever seen her oxygen read 100 without any help from supplemental oxygen.  

And this one shows the relief we all felt getting away from such a scary floor.  We both fell asleep, and she was actually able to transfer to the bed without waking up wide eyed!

Thank you, God, for this invigorating, big step in the right direction.  We are grateful beyond words. 

Moving on up

We are packing up a bit, attempting to get Willow to eat, and moving on up to floor 8!  They said it was the electrolytes that messed with her heart rhythm.

Willow is currently off her oxygen, and they're doing a trial run.  She's sitting pretty at an oxygen saturation of 93-96.  

Last night when she woke (more than once every hour), she cried a little bitty cry.  She even said Mama this morning right when she woke!  This is progress, as the night before she laid there not sleeping much but just staring into space.  She still won't talk to us or anyone, and she will only look at us for a short time.  We would love for her to express what she wants again.  Our doctor said that this is most likely her stress response, which makes sense to us.  She seems just like the little girl we met over a year ago with the exception of the big cries.  It's really odd to experience it again, but we will be patient!

I'm very hopeful that when we move to another room and play with some toys, she will realize this isn't forever and will come out of her shell a bit.  We will also back track a little on attachment and bonding strategies, letting her be in control of how quickly we speak and show affection.  She hasn't had any control over all of this mess, so we want to give her some.  Also, she cries a tiny cry when medical people look at her, even if it's not to do anything painful.  I'm grateful she's not glassy eyed about it anymore, because our girl normally cries when those things happen!

Me, too, Willow!  My adrenaline is gone!!

Oh the ICU...

A sign that you've been in ICU too long is that you have your locker combination memorized.  And I never memorize numbers anymore!

Another sign is that when people come in, it feels like they've just entered your bedroom.  I wonder sometimes if I left out unmentionables.  :)

Well, we are in for one more night on this loud, wild, beeping floor.  Willow's sinus rhythm had a few bumps when it turned junctional.  (Don't laugh at me if you're a medical person!  I try.)  So, they'll need to watch her to make sure it was what they're thinking it was.  They think it's calcium and potassium deficits, so she got supplements today.  That would be an easy fix!

It was an event, because they all ran in to do an EKG to catch the heart in that rhythm.  I can't wait until urgent medical events are not the norm.  Right after last night's progress, the nurse practitioner was almost positive she would get to move floors today.  Nope.

Willow also got her last chest tube out, so she will be easier to move around now.  One doctor carefully tried to get her to stand, but she just flopped her legs.  Our cardiologist mentioned that of all the complications to have, the ones Willow has had have been 'good' ones.

Kyle went in to work for a bit.  We are learning patience.  We are learning appreciation for the little things.  We see medicine with new eyes and are completely amazed.  We are grateful to God for life.  I will say all of the 'events' have been traumatizing for all three of us.  We have endured the stress, but now we need to relax our bodies and begin to process.  Poor Willow just wants to zone out and watch TV and be babied.  So that's what we will do!

Look!  I never thought her lips and nails looked purple until this-- light pink!  That means she has great oxygen flow.

6:00pm update

We are in a better place than we were earlier today.  Slow and steady!

Willow didn't 'wake up' for over 48 hours after being extubated this second time.  When she was awake, she wasn't awake.  We began to get pretty scared when her eyes were glazed over anytime she stirred or was awoken by medical staff.  She also didn't speak this time like she did following the first extubation.

She did take longer than normal to get back to herself; however, this afternoon while drinking some juice, watching Frozen, and having some visits with loved ones, we saw our girl peeking out again!  It is clear she is going to go in and out of it as an effect of the crazy amounts of sedation she had.  Relief washed all over us once we saw she could focus her eyes again! 

Also, Willow got a second chest tube out (ouch!), and she got her neck line out.  One chest tube to go!  She had to get a new IV, and her wiring for potential need of a pacemaker was pulled (yay!). That means her heart rhythm looks great.

Basically, it was a stressful day from the start (with lots of things removed) until about 3:00pm, when our awesome God gave us a taste of our daughter again which was the best relief.

Now we get to order some soft foods!  We ordered hummus, a banana, yogurt, and scrambled eggs.  Since she hasn't eaten in a week, I think she will be quite delighted.  I hope!  I want to see more sneak peeks of my girl again!

This was right when the light came on in her eyes:

Also, last night after she fell asleep, we went on a date.  After which I promptly said, "Did I eat my Snickers?  I don't remember!"

6:30am update

Good morning. 

I think today I woke up feeling excited at the possibility of Willow being less sedated.  All she did during day shift yesterday was sleep.  However, she is still very out of it, sleeping it off.  I guess it is just taking her a bit longer to get it out of her system.  What makes that hard is that after the first extubation, we saw tiny glimpses of our girl's personality.  However, this time she just sleeps and her eyes are glazed over. 

Please pray they will stay on top of her pain as she continues to wake.  Pray her lungs will improve.  Pray her heart continues to heal.  Pray we will have wisdom today regarding what kind of stimulation to give her.  (Do we let her sleep again for healing or try more actively to wake her up?)  Of course, pray the doctors will figure out the best possible plan for her today.  

I'm weary today; I can only imagine how she feels.  

"I am weary with my crying out; my throat is parched. My eyes grow dim with waiting for my God."

(Psalm 69:3 ESV)

Kyle held her yesterday...

We sat her up as the nurse bathed her well, and she was definitely ready to lay back down afterwards.  Check out the hospital gown she got after bath:

When I go to eat breakfast or something (because the only thing that's allowed in Willow's room is bottled water), I always see these flowers.  Someone got them from someone, and they couldn't take them to their child's room.  Anyway, these flowers are the flowers that refuse to droop.  Strange as it seems, they inspire me!  I think they also remind me of the kindness and care from our loved ones.

What a wonderful morning

Good morning! It is 7:30am, and Willow has slept all night long.  Literally only one time did she move around enough for me to wake and see if she wanted her paci.  That's way less than when she was sedated, odd as that sounds!  (They mentioned today that this is the first actual rest she has gotten that hasn't been from sedation, so she has needed great, natural sleep.)

I'm thrilled she's not experiencing pain.  Her chest x-ray looked like the lungs had cleared on one side, but the other side is still hazy.  This morning her eyes can open!!  I know it's a little thing, but having them not be so swollen and seeing her look around a bit is a treasure.  They weaned her oxygen a little even though they hadn't planned on it overnight, because her blood gases looked so good.

So far she's been easy to comfort post extubation.  She's just so sweet and sleepy, using a tiny little voice on occasion, and this morning kind of grinning when I was teasing her with the paci.  We love that grin!

My favorite is when I ask her if she wants something (to turn on her side or to hold her puppy or something), and she quietly whispers, "Yeah."  It's very cool to us that she has the power to communicate with us a little now, even though she's still very sleepy.

They'll likely want her to keep sleeping as much as possible today to continue to heal.  Although the nurse was happy she turned herself over enough during her sleep to get her lungs working that stuff out.

Because of Willow's clunky hands, and also maybe because it feels good against her chest, she's been preferring to sleep while holding her stuffed animals like this:

Extubated around 11:30

Looks more comfortable already.  Prayers for those lungs please!

Things Willow said when she woke:

-drink

-no

-white great (grape) juice

-mama

-daddy

-no

-no

When the nurse put her in my lap, she said:

-go

-down

This girl's ready to walk out of here.  Asleep now almost two hours, and my arm is completely asleep.  Loving it!

Extubating today - 9:55am update

Good morning!  

We all slept pretty well last night, despite the fact that our nurse had two rooms.  (She was really good, so two rooms was no problem!)  Willow had some episodes of being frustrated last night from like 10:00-11:30pm, and then again this morning at around 4:00am.  Just now she was moving and I went to go calm her.  She started mouthing mama over and over, and that's when I just cry.  She's wanting me to help her out of that, but I can't.  My mom reminded me though that at least she knew I was there.

Willow passed another breathing test in the night with flying colors.  So as soon as they're ready and believe she's awake enough, they'll do it!  Please pray for all the details to go smoothly with extubation and introducing liquids, etc.  We are nervous but excited.  We are making her story about the first extubation clearly known to each person on her medical team today (as if they don't already know, but hearing it one more time couldn't hurt).

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

Update 8pm

Nothing has really changed for our girl at this point.  We miss her so much.  I know she needs this time on the ventilator to heal, but I just want to see her smile and hear her speak.  

Today she's negative (a good thing) for fluid output.  That means she's getting enough fluid out now, unlike last night.  Also, today she passed a two hour breathing test (that she failed in the middle of the night).  Go, Willow!  She's had some times of agitation today (mainly during the breathing test), but she's been peacefully resting most of the time.  If the night goes as well as the day went, we will be extubating tomorrow.

I know I've said this before, but it's so hard to be in an environment where the life of so many children is touch and go.  Please pray for families who have experienced loss or scary medical emergencies.  Every room around us has experienced one of those things.   

Every day we have a new nurse, and I think to myself, "This is my new favorite!" 

Nurses and doctors completely rule.  

8:45am update-- we slept!

Willow is doing just fine today.  We all three slept!!  They're most likely going to keep her on the breathing tube until they're completely certain her lungs can handle it.  So, we don't think that will happen today.  

Let's pray she will initiate breaths, her lungs will be strengthened, and she will release as much fluid as she's taking in.

We will get cultures back on Friday, and we are praying those tell us positive things, too.

Love to all our family and friends!  We feel  hopeful for a great day.  God is our light.

Not much to report, 5:15pm

I figured I should maybe blog even though I have nothing really to say.  That's a good thing!  

She has done a little better with sedation this time around.  There is nothing more torturous to me than trying to soothe her back to sleep when she wakes.  She is so panicky in those moments and opens her mouth trying to scream.  I'm so grateful that the sedation will prevent her from remembering how traumatic this part feels to her, but I'm not sure I will ever forget it myself.  Last night anytime I fell asleep, I dreamed about nerve wracking hospital moments.  

Also, even if our room is calm, chances are one of the rooms around us is not.  We have seen several women walking with escorts as they bawl.  So many hard things happen here.  Please pray for other families facing hopeless medical situations or loss.  May the God of comfort fill them with peace.

When my emotions are crazy after seeing that struggle with her tube, I try to remind myself that she's so much better off right now.  I am so grateful for that life giving breathing tube even though it's uncomfortable.  

Praying her fever stays down, her lungs heal, and she steers clear of infection of any kind.  Her x-ray has looked relatively good.  She got a feeding tube in her nose with formula for some nourishment.  Praying also that with all that's going on, the doctors will continue to be able to find her 'happy place'.  This is truly a balancing act!

8:15am update from surgeon

During rounds this morning, we learned a little bit more of what they believe happened last night.

Willow's specific procedure was very intensive, and they don't perform it often.  She looked on the outside like she was better than she actually was, which the surgeon said is typical for someone who has had the heart stopped for that long.  (I thought she looked bad myself, but okay!)

So the nurses believed she was ready to tolerate liquids when she was not.  The assumption is that she aspirated into the lungs.  The actual heart is looking good, but now her lungs need to heal. (Although an x-ray last night showed that her diaphragm was knicked a bit in surgery.  That doesn't hurt her as a toddler much but does make extubating more difficult, adding to our problem.)  It sounds like they will be increasing sedation to almost a therapeutic level so that she can relax and heal.  Plans are still to have sedation and the breathing tube for a few days.

So this little ICU room will be our home for a few more days.  

We rely on Willow's Creator during this hard time.  We will praise Him in the storm.  So grateful there's nothing problematic going on with her actual heart.

It's a new day, 7:15am update

Okay, time to give my people an update.

We are very drained.  Willow has been doing the sedation battle with her breathing tube for the last four or five hours.  Before that, right after our scary event last night, she had some medical numbers jumping around, but she wasn't fighting the sedation.  At least we think her vitals are doing well now.  They're breathing for her while her lungs continue to heal.  

We are not helping when she wakes irritated tonight.  After all, it's hard to see her that way and be the bad guy, holding her down.  Sometimes I think her hearing my voice helps, but more often I think it makes her want to wake up more which we don't want.  Also, she thrashes out of the middle of nowhere, especially as she has developed some resistance to the medication, so we will have to jump up and hold her while the nurse runs in (if she's in the hall).  Then they up her doses again if she's really awake.

They're still trying to discover the reason for her episode last night.  Prayers for clear answers as the doctors continue to investigate and problem solve.

Love you, baby girl.  You can do this!  God, we beg for healing.

Prayers please, a step back

We had a bad evening.  Willow's oxygen got low and stayed low.  She had a not so great chest x-ray.  

This means she's back on heavy sedation and the breathing tube as of 8:30pm.  

You know our girl hates the sedation and hates the breathing tube.  

Please pray with us.  Pray for those lungs.  Pray for her oxygen saturation.  We need miracles.  Pretty big setback, but I know God has good for her.  He is our strength and our fortress.  We are running to Him and pleading for a quick turn around.

Pedialyte- 5:44pm

We were excited to be able to give Willow two ounces of pedialyte.  She kept saying, "more wa wa, more wa wa." Distractions weren't working very well, because she just wanted more!  However she eventually relaxed and is now resting.  

She has tolerated it well, so she will get to take some oral pain medicine.  Yay!  Currently she's having some pain breathing, and she moans on the exhale. Her oxygen went down a little bit just because she's not relaxed enough to take good breaths. 

The nurse ordered her a tray of liquids that can be administered throughout the night.  Chicken broth, Popsicle, and jello on the way throughout the course of the night.  And hopefully some sleep!

Sweet friends bless us left and right.

Extubated!

Before:

(watching Frozen)

After:

(paci in!)

Let's rest, baby!  The next thing that will happen is that they'll be finding the right concoction for her pain meds.  

She's currently in and out of sleep, and we have Frozen on to be comforting.  When Elsa shuts the door after 'Let It Go,' we always say, 'Boom!'  Kyle said it quietly, and Willow tried desperately to repeat after him.  It was a tiny whisper of a boom!  Her first word awake (other than mouthing mama and breaking my heart).

Wrestling

The nurses crack me up describing Willow.  One just said it was like WWF in here every 30 minutes.  The other kids in ICU are apparently not as wild.  There are other things I've overheard that just crack me up.  They just have to laugh!

The doctor last night said, "She's either off or on!"  Yep, that's my girl!  When she's happy, she's the happiest!  Right now she's just not very happy.

We are running on not much sleep, but we are trying to get ready for the breathing tube coming out.  They removed a heart line/monitor this morning, and they're about to redress the area.  Extubation should be around noon.  

Please pray for calm!  I'm grateful for her fighter spirit, and it's okay if she needs to be physically held down.  I just hate how it makes all the monitors go crazy because she's stressed.

Rise and shine

We've had a mostly uneventful night.  These doctors and nurses are continually doing their jobs, and let me just say that those jobs are hard.  They have to be on high alert all the time, and I'm so thankful and in awe of them in a new way.

Per her style, Willow fights sedation hard.  However, she's supposed to be sedated until tomorrow, and when they give different medications, it affects other medical numbers.  Like I said before, it seems to be all about balance.  

She has gotten agitated two or three times, and those soft restraints barely hold her down.  The girl is moving like crazy to get out of there at times!  So the nurses calmly keep her still; they are so good.  I try not speaking to her during those times, and I try speaking to her during those times.  Just not sure what to do to keep her as calm as possible.  

She is NOT going to be calm at all.  She's not enjoying that breathing tube, and her eyes get so big.  

However, she's stable.  She's recovering from major heart surgery. This is just going to be hard.  She's going to wake up angry and anxious.

I've been told she would be very calm tonight under sedation and that we will need to be ready to help days two and three.  I'd like to ask that you all continue to first and foremost pray for Willow to heal.  Also, we would love prayer for us and the medical team to know how to comfort her and keep her calm.  

Together Again!

It's 7:45pm, day of surgery.  We are together in ICU. 

She is still asleep, but she has tiny little bursts of attempting to wake up.  She began to gag last time.  :(  They gave her more sedation.

If I tickle her foot, she moves it.  If we ask her to squeeze a hand, she does it about 50% of the time.  If we put a hand over her knee, she stirs.  If we sing or talk to her, her eyes flutter.  

I get so excited when her eyes flutter.

However, ever since the gagging, I really don't want her to wake at all!  I'm being good and quiet now.

This room is intense.  There are so many things hooked up to her tiny body, and there are tons of machines behind her.  It's overwhelming, but she's healing!  The nurses and doctors are amazing.  Both our cardiologist and our surgeon came to check on her before leaving for the day.  We laughed about how she didn't get an EKG until going in!  So far, we are making progress, but there is a lot ahead for Willow.  Everything is an incredible, delicate balance.  Medicine is miraculous.

Kyle and I kept telling her over and over and over that we are right here, right by her.  That is the BIG message I want her to get right now.  We tell her how much we love her, how she can close her eyes and rest right now, and how she's doing so awesome.  Mostly, I want her to feel our presence, because we didn't get to be there for her the first time around!

Love to all of our family and friends tonight.

Success!!

We had our consult with Forbess at 2:45pm.  For your entertainment, here is a photo of the size of that consultation room we were going crazy in!  

4-5 hours turned into 6 1/2, but things are going well.

He actually decided to close the chest cavity, because he wasn't concerned about swelling.

He used a 16 mm conduit instead of 14 like he thought.

He was able to perform the Rastelli, and the baffling has no blockage.  This means she has a biventricular heart.

Echo looks good!  The electrical rhythm of her heart is great, so no need for a pacemaker at this time.

He left the Glenn, because he said the Glenn pressures looked good.  And it was going to be too much in one operation for him to take that down.

Right atrium (& her whole heart really) is  kind of small.  They did a good job on the Glenn procedure in Shanghai, and he found an additional thing that they did successfully there that we didn't know about until today.  Her heart being small means that she has a good heart that performs well.

Because her heart was stopped for 150 minutes, it is stiff.  The relaxation isn't the greatest, but that's typical.  

He will keep her on the breathing machine overnight.   

Her oxygen saturation is immediately 100!

Thank You, Lord!!  God is amazing, all the time.  I am so grateful He sustained her life and brought us these incredible medical professionals.

Our prayers have been answered.  She is healing!  We saw her for a brief second being wheeled by, but now we have to wait an hour and a half.

2:34 update...

Said everything went well so far.  Coming to get us now to meet with surgeon in consult room!  Will know details soon; praise God!

We saw a priest getting tissues for people near the end, and it got very challenging to wait.  We are about to enter the chapter of being able to sit and be with her while she heals.  Thankful!

This is in our consult room:

Still waiting...

God's timing-- read this just as I needed it!  Very hard to wait right now.  

"I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!" 

Psalms 27:13-14

Update at 1:15

Update...  

Progressing as expected and still in surgery.  Things are going well so far.  She will call in an hour and a half OR if they finish up before that, she will have someone take us to a consult room to meet with the surgeon.

I have received so much scripture today, and it is awesome.  So flooded with the peace that passes understanding.  Please continue praying with us!

Update at 11:35

We got a call.  She said it's progressing along as expected.  Kyle asked if she could share any specifics about decisions, and she said she didn't want to say anything incorrectly but he would fill us in at the end of surgery.  She isn't sure how much longer the surgery will be but will call back in another hour and a half.

Got a call

They started 10 minutes ago.  9:45 AM.  Things are going well.  They'll update us again in an hour and a half.

The hands that made the stars are holding your heart.

Almost an hour in

When we woke Willow this morning, I told her she slept great, because she has been waking on occasion lately and didn't wake all night.  She kept saying, "Nap great!"  

We said goodbye to her room, the puppies, and the house.  We talked about how we were going to stay for lots of days at the 'hospital home' just like in several of her books at home.  Willow corrected me if I said 'hospital house'.  Funny girl!  In the car we talked about how it was still dark, and we were asking where Mr. sun was!  Willow kept saying, "Sun go??"  (Where did the sun go?) She made me laugh by telling the chair and our living room bye bye!  

Then we checked in and now we are waiting.

It was a difficult goodbye.  Our little fighter has always struggled with sedation and 'happy juice'.  She doesn't cave to it easily!  They were trying to get an EKG before surgery since she didn't get one at our pre-op appointment, but even though she was about to fall over, she cried and tried standing the whole time.  I didn't know I was going to have to be the bad guy this morning! :(  Anyway, eventually they gave up and took her in, although she cried and didn't want to go.  The lady doing the EKG was just going to have to scrub up!   Oh, Willow!  ❤️

Now we wait two-ish hours while they are just doing IVs and other preparations.  We will get a call when they move on to the next step.

Night before surgery

Willow is scrubbed down and tucked in, we have all we think we need ready to go, I've had my cry, and we are as ready as we are gonna be.  What a crazy first father's day together.

We tried to savor these moments, and we needed to stay away from possible germs as well.  That meant a day at home!

Alright, so to our prayer warriors-- we couldn't do this without you.  Period.  

Please continue to pray for things to go even better than expected.  Pray for miracles.  Pray the doctors have great wisdom and great success in their life giving work tomorrow.  We are so very blessed to have this medical care for our daughter.  And we are blessed with the emotional support, practical support, and prayers of you all.  So thank you!

God, we give You all the glory and praise.   

I'll be posting updates as I'm able during surgery tomorrow.  

Willow's Family Day

One year ago exactly we met this precious soul on the other side of the world.  Nothing has ever been so worth the wait.  

Happy 'Three Day'!  On this anniversary of beholding you for the very first time, we can't even believe how much you've grown.  You are speaking in sentences, sometimes even paragraphs!  You're taller and so much bigger in many ways.  You're forever our little baby, our little 'bao bao'.  

We thoroughly enjoyed getting you out of bed today with excitement and totally confusing you.  We enjoyed dinner together at a Chinese food place we've never been.  We loved each picking out a flower, eating dessert, and watching home videos of our first moments together on the big TV.  We also enjoyed giving you your first little treasure from China-- flash cards in English and Mandarin.  

We pray for you, sweet one.  

"And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ." (Philippians 1:9-10 ESV)

Thoughts Going Into Willow's Surgery

Writing helps me, and if there’s anything we need right now facing the scariest moments of our lives, it is help.

Unfortunately I do not have the resources or the strength to get through what I have to get through over the next couple of weeks.

Fortunately, God has freely given me what I need.  I am utterly helpless, situationally depressed, and anxious.  He is my strong tower.  I will run to Him over and over every step of this journey.

I am reminded of that phone call with the cardiologist who reviewed our referral file for us over a year ago.  I remember watching my strong husband cry with grief over the health issues we would face with our child.  I remember my joy and grief intertwining as I recognized in him the love a father has for his child.  Pain, loss and grief coexisted with immense amounts of joy and gratitude for the gift of our daughter’s life and the God who had sustained her thus far.  We could not wait to be there with her, walking the medical battles she faced alongside her. 

Now, we are here.  It’s not all joy and bliss to face this battle.  The sense of dread and the anticipation has been torturous, even though we only knew about the surgery date a couple of months in advance.  I don’t want to subject my innocent child who has already endured enough to this. 

I have to hold on to those original moments.  When I looked at Kyle and knew he was this baby girl’s dad.  When my heart soared with love for a baby I did not yet know and had not yet met but had finally pinpointed.  When we realized with awe and praise to God that she had been well cared for, better cared for than we could have imagined.  When the cardiologists told us once we were all home that there was a better, though more complex, surgery that she might have an option to receive.  And now, we are facing that better surgery; we are here standing at the top of a mountain, celebrating the most wonderful kind of love we’ve ever known, and God is asking us to jump again. 

Another leap of faith, and sometimes I don’t think I am going to get through it. 

Thankfully, God created Kyle and I uniquely and complimentary, and he is strong when I cradle and vice-versa.  

We have a village of people who love us well around us.  To our village, you know who you are.  You are so very loved and needed, more than we can verbalize or explain.  We’ve been poor at listening and serving during the past two months, but we appreciate your grace.  Surely in the future we will be decent at it again at some point!

We enter into this thing quietly and with faith.  That doesn’t mean that we don’t dread it.  I will falter a million times.  I will think wrongly, rush to anger out of frustration, and neglect to adequately thank those who hold us up through the worst of it.  However, I enter into this knowing that we serve a God who loves us, a God who gave His very own Son for us.  I cannot help but think about the cross.  We serve a God who promises that He has good plans for us, plans to give us a hope and a future.  We trust Him above anything else, the God who placed a miraculous blessing of a little girl into our lives and has since deepened and shaped the love in our little family. 

He doesn’t always give us what we want, but He has good plans for us.  I will trust in the Lord.  He is worthy of my praise today and every day. 



What can you pray for?

*Please pray for Willow’s emotional and physical strength before, during and after surgery.  Pray she would stay healthy prior to the surgery as well.

*Please pray that the surgeon, Dr. Forbess, will be guided by God, our Creator, Sustainer and Savior.

*Please pray that the doctors will make the very best decisions for Willow’s unique anatomy.  They must decide if they will take down her Glenn or not (a surgery she got in Shanghai).  They must also decide between the Rastelli procedure (through which she would have a two ventricle heart, more complex) or the Fontan (she would only have a one ventricle heart).

*Please pray for God-given wisdom for her team of professionals.

*Please pray for courage, wisdom and strength for us as her parents as we walk her through this.  Pray that she would allow us to comfort her and remain close to her during this trial.

*Please pray Willow would not have too much pain.

*Please pray that no complications would occur and that the surgery would heal her physical heart for a long time.

*Please pray that any complications, if any occur, would be minor and not difficult for her to overcome.

*Please pray for physical healing, for the best case scenario for our baby girl.

*Please pray that this surgery will allow her to have great long-term health and quality of life.

*Please pray that God graciously gives us laughter, joy and the ability to handle the stress.  Pray that we are patient.

*Please pray that we would be helpful to Willow and to one another.

*Please pray that we would be a light for Christ, that those we interact with would be pointed to the Lord and experience His love.


“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”  Psalm 73:26

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.”  Psalm 56:3



Scripture talks constantly about Jesus as the healer.  He is a God of miracles.  The doctors are always amazed at how well Willow seems for a child with her specific heart defect.  We believe and humbly ask Him now to heal Willow’s heart. 

Thank you to everyone who says a prayer for our miracle baby! 

An Engagement and Tennessee

We've got a wedding to plan, people!  Sparkling cider and lots of hugs.  Ryan, we are thrilled to have you!

Treasures.  The team at Show Hope sent us some things Willow did in a preschool class.  All the way from Luoyang, China!

This was on her crib.  I can't put into words how incredible it is to receive pieces of her history like this.  (Willow's sponsor name was Eisley, but her nannies and friends called her Mei Fen which we kept as her middle name.)

Boo!

Sonic's peanut butter shake we both found yummy!

Off to Franklin, Tennessee for the Show Hope Care Centers Reunion.  We attempted two vacations with only one week break.  Slightly crazy...

The airport was amazing!! Willow was proud to give her ticket all by herself.  The last time we were here, we had just met each other, so I felt nostalgic.

When we got off the plane, I asked her what her favorite thing was about it. Clouds.  I love it!  Looking out the window...

She slept through the landing, oddly enough.

Our silver car for only two days...

So the car we called the 'Tennessee car' and our room we called the 'hotel home'.

So hungry for lunch and cranky by 2:00!  Not the best planning... 

We arrived at Show Hope's office for an open house.  I cried probably four times.  What wonderful people, what an important cause, and what a blessing to get a chance to verbalize our gratitude.  It's hard to explain, but just being near the people who give everything for Chinese children in need of homes meant the world.  Being hosted so warmly was overwhelming in the best way.

Willow feels like this is the life.  A swing, a sucker, and a new giraffe toy!  Friendly people everywhere!

Tons of little faces hung from the ceiling in a touching display of all the children who have been in their care and now have families.  We searched forever to find our girl.  We got very excited once we finally found it!

Delicious coffee shop next door?  You don't have to tell us twice.

We promised the hotel pool, so she got the hotel pool!  Even though it was getting late and kinda cold.

She was difficult to get to fall asleep and opted to sleep in our big bed both nights.

Day 2: Party day!

We've corresponded through emails with her for years now.  God is gracious to allow us to meet...

We got to talk to Mary Beth Chapman the day before, and Steven Curtis Chapman on party day (as well as some of their children).  What memorable moments.  Thank you for providing a place for our girl to overcome the adversity she faced.  Thank you for blessing all of these strangers and having us over, because we share camaraderie and it just feels good to be together.  Thank you for praying for her upcoming surgery.

David was so nice to Willow.  He's the one who gave her a giraffe toy she named, 'Gaga'.

The buckets of rice said...

'This jar represents the number of orphans in the world.'

'This jar represents the number of college students in the U.S.'

Waiting in line for a balloon animal...

Willow made a sweet friend...

Fahlin was in Willow's room at MBHOH, and her mom said she loves her 'China babies'.  Sweetheart!  Pray for her health!

Stevie Joy had a picture on her phone of playing with Willow at MBHOH.  She exemplifies her middle name...

This cutie, Judah, was also in Willow's room at MBHOH.  We adopted Willow right when he got adopted, and we flew back to the states on the same plane.  He grinned ear to ear seeing her, and I got to thank him for being so sweet to all of the babies.

When asked later what her favorite part of the Show Hope party was, Willow said the hay ride.

A little bit of downtown Nashville before we went home.  Willow loved the guitars everywhere and the horse drawn carriages.

Well, look- it's Taylor Swift!

Music everywhere!

Kyle and I laughed about this weird picture for a long time...

Last stop at the pool...

One last thing...